The Lord is a Faithful God.

Blessed are those who wait for Him to help them. (Isaiah 30:18).  This is the verse that I have repeated to myself whilst falling asleep the past few nights.  It's been pretty comforting. 

To update:  Baby B has a bad placenta.  He's been squished by his larger brother for most of this pregnancy, and the blood flow through his cord isn't what it should be.  This makes him too small for his age.  He's on the charts, largely due (probably) to the enormous amount of protein that I've been consuming over the past month.  (side note here, Baby A and myself are tracking the 75th percentile nicely due to the protein as well).  But no one knows what sort of health problems he may have after he's born, if any.  No one knows what caused his placenta to look the way it does.  No one knows why the cord flow isn't up to speed. No one knows how long he will continue to grow inside of me (although at this point, I'm hoping and praying a minimum of 5 weeks with a larger goal of 9 weeks).  All we can do is look at him every day and just see how he seems to be doing in there.  There has been some speculation, and some "intervention" if you want to call it that (hospital bed rest, protein, fluids, oxygen), but the bottom line is no one knows.

No one except the Lord.  He has a wonderful plan for His entire creation that will bring Him all of the glory that is His. There is a bigger picture.  The picture is about Him, not me.  I know that I am a part of His plan and He will use me for His glory.  He will use these babies for His glory.  I don't know how, and it might not be the way I want things to work out, but life isn't about me.  That's not a real popular idea.  Especially in our culture today where everyone is convinced that the purpose of life is to do what makes you happy.  Emphasis on you.  Find yourself, be true to yourself, etc. etc.  Buy more things, because that will make you happy.  Get a better education, because then you'll have more knowledge, which will make you happy, or if that doesn't, then the money that your better job will get you will make you happy.  Really?  Is that what life is about? Personal happiness?  It's a great side effect of living a life of purpose, but not the purpose in and of itself.  I think God likes blessing his children.  He doesn't enjoy watching us suffer.  But our happiness is not His plan.  His glory is.  So for now I can find comfort in knowing that He has always had a plan, nothing will change that, and I already know how the story ends.  So for my part, I know the Lord is faithful, and if I wait on Him, then I can fulfill my part of His plan, whatever that may be.